Hey all, this was supposed to be posted here yesterday, but instead, I posted to my other blog. And I am without computer, so, "Oops, sorry, redirect...."
http://seekingthehollows.blogspot.com/
- Posted by mobile; forgive my grammatical shortcomings. -
*UPDATE
I have imported all posts from the Seeking the Hollows blog over here. I will keep that one up for posts related just to that project, and for the meantime, will cross-post to both if it seems appropriate.
1.13.2010
"Fear" or "Reference for future plotting against Jenn"
While doing research for the much anticipated (at least by me) redesign of my site, jromaniszak.com, I can across the most complete listing of fears I have ever seen. As I scrolled through, I started to assess whether or not I had a particular fear, and if so, to what degree. What's that syndrome first year med and psych students get where they think they are afflicted with everything they read about? Yeah, it was a slight case of that. I realized there are quite a few things that make me shake in my boots, and a few others that I would pointedly work to develop a fear of, just so I could use the word that it is called. Here is my in-exhaustive list.
Bolshephobia- Fear of Bolsheviks.
Cancerophobia or Carcinophobia- Fear of cancer.
Chrometophobia or Chrematophobia- Fear of money.
Dutchphobia- Fear of the Dutch.
Eremophobia- Fear of being oneself or of lonliness.
Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia- Fear of the number 666.
Kainolophobia or Kainophobia- Fear of anything new, novelty.
Leukophobia- Fear of the color white.
Lockiophobia- Fear of childbirth.
Mechanophobia- Fear of machines.
Pteronophobia- Fear of being tickled by feathers.
Scriptophobia- Fear of writing in public.
Teratophobia- Fear of bearing a deformed child.
Xerophobia- Fear of dryness.
The ill-advised exercise got me thinking about fear, and that old phrase "The only thing to fear, is fear itself."
Bull.
I'm afraid of a lot of things. Not nessicarily bugs or zombies, but plenty of things scare the beegeeses out of me (Hey, my grandfather had to flee the Bolsheviks!). And then there's the guilt about the fear, because Christ's most often repeated command is the "do no fear" type. And don't forget then the inevitable fear that the guilt will never go away, and the fear that Jesus will be mad at me that I feared at all in the first place..
For me, fear could be synonymous with worry. I worry about money; I worry about being alone on a Friday night. Sometimes I even catch myself worrying that I will worry about something later. There are so many things that could go wrong in the world, that to worry about them all, to fear every little thing, could become all-encompassing, soul swallowing, and change who you are at the core of your being. It's more than a full time job, AND FEAR IS EXHAUSTING! But even with this logical assessment, I still fear. Even though Christ commands me not too, I still worry. I think He knows this, and that's why Christ takes every chance in the Gospel's to remind us not to fear. We are more than sparrows and lilies and see how they are cared for?
Why are we given such a difficult and abstract command? Sometimes it's even involuntary! Creepy dude runs at me with a butcher knife; shoot, there I go sinning again when I cringe and run away. I think that this command is like a hand full of other key imperatives given by Christ that serve a particular purpose. The rules we struggle with the most are usually the gateway for understanding mercy, and especially grace. Christ also says to give everything away (Rich Young Ruler). He says, "Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." (Matthew 5:38) There is no way for me to make myself perfect just like God, and that's the point.
Lemme break it down fo' ya.
God: "DO NOT FEAR"
Me: (worry, worry, worry)
God: "DO NOT WORRY"
Me: (worry, worry) "...oh shit."
God: "See, that's why you need me."
Me: "Oops... sorry ...again."
The opposite of fear and worry is not bravery. It is trust. We MUST trust that when we are told we are made perfect in Christ, he wasn't lying. There's no way for us to double check.
That's not to say, that you just throw a switch and, WHAM!, now I trust. Even when Paul writes to the Colossians about being perfect, he clearly states there is a process involved. "We proclaim him, admonishing and teaching everyone with all wisdom, so that we may present everyone perfect in Christ. To this end I labor, struggling with all his energy, which so powerfully works in me." The labor allows us to be prefect, but the only way into and through the labor is with "all His energy". It is our labor, our work, our change, but it is His means.
Let me break this into clauses; it makes it easier for me to understand if I say it part by part.
When we overcome our fears,
by being transformed
to trust in the Lord,
we are freed
from the self-centeredness
of a life steered by worry.
When will I eat? What will I wear? We are clearly promised these things if we will only believe in them. (Matthew 6:25-34).
OKAY, now here's the important part:
Being freed from fear opens our lives up to obeying the second most repeated commandment: "Lord God and others." And though it's only second in frequency, Christ does identify this as THE MOST important commandment. " 'Love the Lord your God..., and Love your neighbor as yourself...There is no commandment greater than these.' "
I have a pattern. When I worry, I start worrying more. A metaphor: With each little thorn in my paw, I start looking closer and seeing more and more little thorns that I hadn't seen before. Then I pull out the magnifying glass and when I am just about ready to start bawling, thinking my had is made more of slivers and thorns than muscle, some one will tap me on the shoulder and say, "Sorry, I can see you're busy, but I need some help. As you can see, I just got hit by a falling tree and am bleeding from my eye sockets. Do you have time to point me in the direction of the hospital?"
Fear makes me self-centered, and reinforces selfishness. Trusting requires me to be Christ-centered, and practice selflessness.
So, maybe "The only thing to fear, is fear itself" is not very helpful, but another commonality about fear might be. I forget who says it, but the idea that once you name your fears they are easier to deal with, that gives me comfort. As I learn more and more to recognize the signs that I am acting out of fear for myself and not love for God and others, it gets a little easier.
Bit by bit,
over time,
just like all disciplines.
Bolshephobia- Fear of Bolsheviks.
Cancerophobia or Carcinophobia- Fear of cancer.
Chrometophobia or Chrematophobia- Fear of money.
Dutchphobia- Fear of the Dutch.
Eremophobia- Fear of being oneself or of lonliness.
Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia- Fear of the number 666.
Kainolophobia or Kainophobia- Fear of anything new, novelty.
Leukophobia- Fear of the color white.
Lockiophobia- Fear of childbirth.
Mechanophobia- Fear of machines.
Pteronophobia- Fear of being tickled by feathers.
Scriptophobia- Fear of writing in public.
Teratophobia- Fear of bearing a deformed child.
Xerophobia- Fear of dryness.
The ill-advised exercise got me thinking about fear, and that old phrase "The only thing to fear, is fear itself."
Bull.
I'm afraid of a lot of things. Not nessicarily bugs or zombies, but plenty of things scare the beegeeses out of me (Hey, my grandfather had to flee the Bolsheviks!). And then there's the guilt about the fear, because Christ's most often repeated command is the "do no fear" type. And don't forget then the inevitable fear that the guilt will never go away, and the fear that Jesus will be mad at me that I feared at all in the first place..
For me, fear could be synonymous with worry. I worry about money; I worry about being alone on a Friday night. Sometimes I even catch myself worrying that I will worry about something later. There are so many things that could go wrong in the world, that to worry about them all, to fear every little thing, could become all-encompassing, soul swallowing, and change who you are at the core of your being. It's more than a full time job, AND FEAR IS EXHAUSTING! But even with this logical assessment, I still fear. Even though Christ commands me not too, I still worry. I think He knows this, and that's why Christ takes every chance in the Gospel's to remind us not to fear. We are more than sparrows and lilies and see how they are cared for?
Why are we given such a difficult and abstract command? Sometimes it's even involuntary! Creepy dude runs at me with a butcher knife; shoot, there I go sinning again when I cringe and run away. I think that this command is like a hand full of other key imperatives given by Christ that serve a particular purpose. The rules we struggle with the most are usually the gateway for understanding mercy, and especially grace. Christ also says to give everything away (Rich Young Ruler). He says, "Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." (Matthew 5:38) There is no way for me to make myself perfect just like God, and that's the point.
Lemme break it down fo' ya.
God: "DO NOT FEAR"
Me: (worry, worry, worry)
God: "DO NOT WORRY"
Me: (worry, worry) "...oh shit."
God: "See, that's why you need me."
Me: "Oops... sorry ...again."
The opposite of fear and worry is not bravery. It is trust. We MUST trust that when we are told we are made perfect in Christ, he wasn't lying. There's no way for us to double check.
That's not to say, that you just throw a switch and, WHAM!, now I trust. Even when Paul writes to the Colossians about being perfect, he clearly states there is a process involved. "We proclaim him, admonishing and teaching everyone with all wisdom, so that we may present everyone perfect in Christ. To this end I labor, struggling with all his energy, which so powerfully works in me." The labor allows us to be prefect, but the only way into and through the labor is with "all His energy". It is our labor, our work, our change, but it is His means.
Let me break this into clauses; it makes it easier for me to understand if I say it part by part.
When we overcome our fears,
by being transformed
to trust in the Lord,
we are freed
from the self-centeredness
of a life steered by worry.
When will I eat? What will I wear? We are clearly promised these things if we will only believe in them. (Matthew 6:25-34).
OKAY, now here's the important part:
Being freed from fear opens our lives up to obeying the second most repeated commandment: "Lord God and others." And though it's only second in frequency, Christ does identify this as THE MOST important commandment. " 'Love the Lord your God..., and Love your neighbor as yourself...There is no commandment greater than these.' "
I have a pattern. When I worry, I start worrying more. A metaphor: With each little thorn in my paw, I start looking closer and seeing more and more little thorns that I hadn't seen before. Then I pull out the magnifying glass and when I am just about ready to start bawling, thinking my had is made more of slivers and thorns than muscle, some one will tap me on the shoulder and say, "Sorry, I can see you're busy, but I need some help. As you can see, I just got hit by a falling tree and am bleeding from my eye sockets. Do you have time to point me in the direction of the hospital?"
Fear makes me self-centered, and reinforces selfishness. Trusting requires me to be Christ-centered, and practice selflessness.
So, maybe "The only thing to fear, is fear itself" is not very helpful, but another commonality about fear might be. I forget who says it, but the idea that once you name your fears they are easier to deal with, that gives me comfort. As I learn more and more to recognize the signs that I am acting out of fear for myself and not love for God and others, it gets a little easier.
Bit by bit,
over time,
just like all disciplines.
10.27.2009
Sneaking back into the room.
Ok, I will skip the apologies for forever not updating. Things are busy, but not busy enough to warrant lack of updates.
Things are moving!
Brooklyn Update: My small cottage industry for preserves is has not financed a return trip yet, but I am convinced I am on my way.
National Update:
I attended the National Storytelling festival at the beginning of October where I met a lot of people and was able to get some feedback on my project from people more local to the region (the festival is in Jonesbrough, TN). In particular I had a conversation with one woman who was very excitable, and with Eric Wolf, host of "The Art of Storytelling" podcast, which has been my piecemeal apprenticeship up to this point. What a lovely man! In our short conversation, I was encouraged as well as challenged. He invited me to an eco-tellers conference in April. Really, what a boon; now I have a deadline.
I have been making my way though my "leads list", though not as quickly as I would like. And am hoping for a trip before Christmas. Though, more likely, after New Years. Holidays are busy at the church, and I am not sure that I can really put my coworkers through that. It might necessitate learning some phone recording techniques.
I have yet to launch the local ex-pat call to arms, but I like to say it's because I am waiting on my website to be finished. Like to say, but probably just another excuse.
Things are moving!
Brooklyn Update: My small cottage industry for preserves is has not financed a return trip yet, but I am convinced I am on my way.
National Update:
I attended the National Storytelling festival at the beginning of October where I met a lot of people and was able to get some feedback on my project from people more local to the region (the festival is in Jonesbrough, TN). In particular I had a conversation with one woman who was very excitable, and with Eric Wolf, host of "The Art of Storytelling" podcast, which has been my piecemeal apprenticeship up to this point. What a lovely man! In our short conversation, I was encouraged as well as challenged. He invited me to an eco-tellers conference in April. Really, what a boon; now I have a deadline.
I have been making my way though my "leads list", though not as quickly as I would like. And am hoping for a trip before Christmas. Though, more likely, after New Years. Holidays are busy at the church, and I am not sure that I can really put my coworkers through that. It might necessitate learning some phone recording techniques.
I have yet to launch the local ex-pat call to arms, but I like to say it's because I am waiting on my website to be finished. Like to say, but probably just another excuse.
8.13.2009
Just Peachy
I have been sweating buckets in my kitchen the past three days. Between my broken refrigerator and the 86 degree air temp (seriously, I measured it) I have been racing against time to claim those 17 lbs of peaches for the good cause of canning and not rotting.
But, in the heat of it all (yes! pun!) I came up with a new idea, too! I have been try to figure out how to finance future trips back to West Virginia (which will definitely be happening). SO, here what I came up with. Every time I go, I can pick up a ton of fresh produce and then the week after that, can it all and sell that, throwing the profits back into the WV piggy bank. Certain expenses like buying a car might not get paid for in preserves, but gas money, meal money, etc. could certainly get partially covered.
Additionally, I can design the "packaging" to explain why I am selling it in the first place, and explain more about MTR. Wham! Two birds, one stone.
So as of now, I am open for business, specializing in small batch canning from local farmers, my own garden, and stands and you-pick-it farms in the areas I am traveling to. If you have a request for a particular type of jam, preserve, marmalade, juice, etc. file it into comments, but if I make it you DO have to buy at least two jars.
Current inventory is as follows. All half pint jars. $7-9 (anyone want to refresh me on Paypal?)
3 Peach Butter Sauce
3 Spiced Peach Butter Sauce
4 Peach Jam (no sugar added)
1 Peach Cashew Jam (no sugar added)
I am hoping to get to the cherry tomatoes in my garden this weekend as well as put up some rhubarb from the market before we are totally and completely past rhubarb season.
A note on the actual story telling front. I am starting to make my way through a list of names from all over the state. Rebekah over and Christians for the Mountains was especially helpful in that. I am also tossing around an idea about the WV ex-pats peppering the country.
More to come. Buy Jam.
But, in the heat of it all (yes! pun!) I came up with a new idea, too! I have been try to figure out how to finance future trips back to West Virginia (which will definitely be happening). SO, here what I came up with. Every time I go, I can pick up a ton of fresh produce and then the week after that, can it all and sell that, throwing the profits back into the WV piggy bank. Certain expenses like buying a car might not get paid for in preserves, but gas money, meal money, etc. could certainly get partially covered.
Additionally, I can design the "packaging" to explain why I am selling it in the first place, and explain more about MTR. Wham! Two birds, one stone.
So as of now, I am open for business, specializing in small batch canning from local farmers, my own garden, and stands and you-pick-it farms in the areas I am traveling to. If you have a request for a particular type of jam, preserve, marmalade, juice, etc. file it into comments, but if I make it you DO have to buy at least two jars.
Current inventory is as follows. All half pint jars. $7-9 (anyone want to refresh me on Paypal?)
3 Peach Butter Sauce
3 Spiced Peach Butter Sauce
4 Peach Jam (no sugar added)
1 Peach Cashew Jam (no sugar added)
I am hoping to get to the cherry tomatoes in my garden this weekend as well as put up some rhubarb from the market before we are totally and completely past rhubarb season.
A note on the actual story telling front. I am starting to make my way through a list of names from all over the state. Rebekah over and Christians for the Mountains was especially helpful in that. I am also tossing around an idea about the WV ex-pats peppering the country.
More to come. Buy Jam.
8.11.2009
17 pounds heavier upon return
So I made it back! I am not in a ditch or some where off the side of a mountain.
I got to a certain point in my trip where it was time to focus on a lot of other things, and the travel-blog sort of took a back seat. But, now I am back and going through a lot of processing of what I saw, and heard, and learned already even. I am not ready to articulate it yet, you'll just have to keep checking back.
At the end of the day (week?), it was an amazing trip. God is good, and He is very faithful.
I am doing another type of processing as well. I bought 17 pounds of peaches at one of those pick your own farms on my way back since I had the truck. Tonight was my first adventure into canning, and it smelled delicious at least. Peach butter, and then a spiced peach butter, and then a bit of an experiment with spiced basil peach butter. I am thinking about keeping this up and using the funds to off set future trips. Let me know if you want to buy a jar!
8.04.2009
Zip: 25812; Coal: 72.8%
Well, I am out of energy. Even though I slept 12 hours yesterday, tent sleeping on a slope is not the most refreshing. I was seriously out before the sun was gone last night.
So let me give a bit of a summary post tonight:
Notable anecdotes, no online spoilers, you'll have to ask in person:
-60's Roadside Attraction Military-style Coup
-Jack Spratt & His Wife, and the Grandkids, and Fifi & Bruiser, and the Jones'
-Grafton Supply and Demand
Miles travelled: approx. 843 (averaging 18 mpg, which is 3 more than expected, Score!)
Money spent: Let's skip this one until I look at my bank statements...
Gifts acquired on the tertiary goal of trip, antiquing: 3
New hobby furthered by trip: canning
Tonight I am crashing with the cool kids at Christians for the Mountains at ground zero (or one of many ground zeros) for MTR, in Ansted, WV. They have already been super helpful in the 2 hours I have been here.
Right. Time to crash.
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